There once was a sweet, little Kitty, Who would sit around looking so pretty, But this act was a lie, He was really a Spy, No, you should not believe cats one bitty!
The Baking Blunder!
The following limerick may or may not be based on real events!
There once was an unlucky baker, Who forgot to put flour in her cake-ah! "What a mess!" came her cries, When that cake did not rise, "Oh this cake is a big old mistake-a!"
A Month Without Rain…
We all thought the rain, Was a bit of a pain, Drumming on rooftop, And down window-pane. "This weather!" We grumbled, "Is always the same, It's nothing but rain, rain rain, Rain, rain, rain... Rain." "Go away rain!" We began to complain, "Get on your bike, Adios! Take a hike! Cos we've had it to here, With your damp, soggy drear, Just give us a break, Go away, disappear!" Then one July day, The rain went away, Just packed up its bags, Whilst the sun came to play. And the temperature soared, To heights never known, And the ponds and the rivers, Were as dry as a bone, And the sun grew so hot in the sky overhead, That the grass wasn't green, It was scorched brown instead. And we struggled to sleep, And we tossed and we turned, And the fields set on fire, And the forests they burned, And we suddenly realised, We now understood, Why when God made the rain, He declared "It is good!"
The Poppy by the Gate
Very early, Sunday morn, Grief rising up like a gathering storm, Day-break, Hearts ache, As the weight of it all begins to dawn. Thorns, nails, Mournful wails, Laid in a tomb that wasn't His own, Laden with spices, We make our way, Not even knowing who'll roll back the stone. Earth quake! Guards shake, Heavenly beings in dazzling white, Our hearts pound with fear, Afraid to draw near, We fall to the ground at this awesome sight. Don't fear! He isn't here. Why search for the living amongst the dead? Hurry, go! Let everyone know, That Jesus is risen, just as He said.
To Love A Labrador
To love a Labrador, And all the crazy joy she brings, There's really nothing to it: You must simply learn to love these things: Early starts, Morning barks Dripping hair Rainy parks, Six o'clock On the dot, Rain or shine, Ready or not! Muddy paws, Mopping Floors, Early morning tug-of-wars. Boggy paths, Soggy baths, Crazy capers, Belly laughs. Sloppy kisses, Slimy ball, Dodging, Chasing, Bad recall. Chasing squirrels, Magpies too - Any moving thing will do! Being followed EVERYWHERE, Stolen bits of underwear, Chewed up slippers Patchy lawn, Shredded flowers, Papers torn. Licky face, Tea-towel chase, Zoomy round-the-table-race! Piles of sticks By the door, (Did I mention mopping floor?) Belly rubs, And sofa cuddles, Getting dragged through, Muddy Puddles. Thumping tail, And big hellos, Throw a stick And off she goes!
An hour of toil in the garden, Is always time well-spent Tugging out those stubborn old weeds, Which year upon year won't relent. An hour spent tending the garden, Is never wasted time, Lungs full of wonderful sweet, Spring air, Hands caked in dirt and grime. It's hard to feel glum in the garden, With birds chirping high in the trees, Potting up Pansies, so cheery and bright, Hair tugged about by the breeze. Cutting the deadwood, turning the earth, Allowing the sun to shine through, Seems to clear my cluttered mind, And lifts my spirits too. Thank you dear Lord for my garden, Humble and small though it be, It's a place where so often I've felt You are near, And Your joy surrounding me. Once You knelt down in a garden, And in terrible anguish You cried, "Thy will, not Mine, be done O Lord!" Abandoned. Betrayed. Denied. One Sunday morn, in a garden, You rose up again from the grave, Bringing salvation and mercy and grace, To the ones You came to save!
Happy New Year!
Ring out the old, and ring in the new, Another year passes, but one thing is true, A thousand small blessings have slipped through my hands, Moments uncountable, vast as the sands. Ordinary days that have come, And then gone, A sunrise, a sunset, A whisper, A song. Times spent with family, Long summer days, Here for a moment, Then gone in a haze. I wish I could hold all these moments forever, Time marches onward, But love ceases never. So I'm thankful, so thankful, For all that has been, For the highs and the lows, And the bits in between, This journey of life With its ups and its downs, The trials and the triumphs, The joys and the frowns, This life I've been given, I long to embrace, To cherish each moment, Each dear, precious face, Yet to live in surrender, Not grasping too tight, To live for eternity To walk in the light, Knowing this life is a gift from above, That it all comes from you, Oh great Father of love.